


15.

by giftedsun



Category: BanG Dream! (Anime), BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Future Fic, Imai Lisa matchmaker, Mutual Pining, Pining, Reconciliation, gonna cry about it?, kind of, post-Roselia, sayo sure is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:21:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25369036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/giftedsun/pseuds/giftedsun
Summary: It's been two years since Sayo Hikawa last saw Yukina Minato. It's been four years since Roselia broke up permanently.  And it's been twelve years since Sayo told Yukina something that changed their relationship beyond repair.Fifteen years after Roselia first performed, Lisa wants to get the band back together again.
Relationships: Hikawa Sayo/Minato Yukina
Comments: 11
Kudos: 60





	15.

Sayo sees it on the train home from work: a notification reawakening the dormant Roselia group chat. The previous message, sent nearly a year ago, was from Sayo herself. She had thanked the other members for coming to her going-away party.

Now, however, a new message rests below Sayo’s thanks, one from Imai Lisa.

It shouldn’t be much of a surprise, and yet, to Sayo, it still is. She had lost track of days, busy with the new job, but it was unusual for Sayo to forget such things, even years later.

Next month, it would be fifteen years since Roselia’s first performance. Lisa had proposed a reunion of sorts, just a simple meet up for lunch or something. Ako had enthusiastically, and quickly agreed, with Rinko following soon after. 

Hours later, as Sayo prepared dinner, she watched her phone light up with one more notification.

_ Minato Yukina:  _ I’ll be present.

With a feeling of rising dread, Sayo turns her phone screen off and continues peeling potatoes.

It would be easy enough to refuse, Sayo rationalized. After all, the other former Roselia members were located in Tokyo primarily, although Ako sometimes traveled for her esports tournaments. Sayo, all the way out in Osaka, could tell Lisa that getting away from work was too much of a pain, or that the ticket for the bullet train was unaffordable at the moment.

But Sayo also knew her flimsy excuses could not match the sheer will of Imai Lisa. The other girl would have driven the 6-or-so hours to pick Sayo up, driven back to Tokyo, then back to Osaka, and back to Tokyo on her own if it meant all of Roselia could be together once more.

_ Together. _ The thought was nice. They hadn’t even all come to Sayo’s party at the same time, Ako leaving early to not miss prime nighttime gaming hours, Rinko slipping out with Tomoe sometime before Lisa arrived, exhausted from another grueling day at Tokyo’s top fashion and lifestyle magazine.

Yukina hadn’t bothered to show up. Instead, Sayo had found a bouquet sitting on her welcome mat in the morning, slightly crushed, with a card indicating the sender and nothing more. 

It was a ridiculous thing to send. There was no logical way for her to travel with them, but Sayo had found herself cradling them in her arms as she sat in the passenger seat of the moving truck, her sister leaning over from the driver's seat to smell them.

Hina had learned a bit of tact as she had grown older, and she didn’t ask who they were from, rather, just commented on their beauty.

_ One last thing, _ Sayo had told herself. I’ll hold onto these flowers, and once they’ve wilted, I’ll let it go for good.

Roselia is long-disbanded, the announcement coming at the end of a two-year-long hiatus, to little surprise but quite a bit of disappointment. It’s been nearly five years since the girl band has stood on stage together.

Sometimes, Sayo gets recognized, and the Roselia fan asks her about the band’s breakup. Will they ever perform again? Does she miss playing the guitar? Are the members still close?

If Sayo’s feeling open, she’ll say that she misses performing with Roselia, but ultimately it was time to grow up. The members keep in contact with and love each other dearly, but it was time for them to move on. Disbanding was for the best so they could pursue other passions.

If Sayo’s got a few drinks in her, she’ll say, flushed in the face, that Roselia was the best thing that ever happened to her and she doesn’t know how to function without her band. She barely talks to anyone she knew in high school, save for her sister, and isn’t that a change. Roselia’s breakup wasn’t a choice, but a natural conclusion.

If Sayo’s got a few more drinks in her— which rarely happens— she’ll say, through a couple of tears, that she misses her best friend. That she ruined everything, but Minato-san also ruined Roselia. That Roselia had to end because it wasn’t the same anymore.

Usually, she’ll just smile and say thank you for being so devoted to Roselia, would you like an autograph or perhaps a picture?

They’ve all taken up day jobs— even Yukina, much to Sayo’s surprise. She anticipated Yukina continuing with music, and while she hasn’t embarked on a solo career, the silver-haired girl is still entrenched in the music industry, working at various music houses around Tokyo. Rumor has it that she’s been chosen to take over CiRCLE whenever Marina decides to retire. 

Sayo’s also found herself unable to leave the industry, although she’s left the Tokyo scene. She now produces and manages a girl band in Osaka, performing at the tiny, wild dive bars that populate the prefecture. 

It’s hard work, and it pays nearly nothing, but Sayo wouldn’t dare leave behind her group for more money. Helping the younger girls find a foothold in Osaka’s wild scene is rewarding enough. 

Sayo checks her calendar and clears all of her meetings for the weekend of the anniversary. The band she manages has a concert that weekend, and she usually attends all of their shows, but her assistant, Miyuki, can handle it. 

_ Hikawa Sayo:  _ See you all next month.

On the bullet train, Sayo struggles to drift off. Much as she would like to sleep, the reality of facing her band members again weighs on her mind. 

The reality of seeing  _ Yukina _ again. Because that was it, really. She hadn’t seen the other girl in more than two years, and it had been awkward between them for so much longer than that. 

Much as Sayo knew part of the blame was on her, she couldn’t ignore the anger she felt at Yukina. They had said no personal feelings, they had said nothing gets in the way of music— and yet, in the end, they both had failed at that key precept. 

They both knew why Roselia had really ended, and they both knew why their relationship was so different now. 

… Sayo had vowed to let it go, but it was getting harder and harder as she approached Tokyo. As she, in some way, approached Yukina.

* * *

Lisa had planned an astonishing amount of events for the former band members, true to her nature. At least, she had attempted to— after reading the initial itinerary, Sayo had forced her to cut it down a bit. The bandmates would meet for dinner on Friday night, then lunch on Saturday, at their old favorite family-style restaurant. Lisa would take her shopping on Sunday, then bid her farewell at the station. It would be quick. Easy. 

As Sayo showed up to the restaurant, a fancier place that Lisa had offered to foot the bill for, she could already see Lisa sitting at a semi-circle shaped booth. She looked no different than she had the last time Sayo saw her— pretty and well dressed as always. The primary difference was the lack of bags under her eyes, which Sayo attributed to her recent promotion— no more backbreaking intern work.

“Imai-san,” she greeted warmly, hugging the other woman as she rose. “It’s been too long.”

“Oh, Sayo, still calling me Imai-san after all these years?” Lisa laughed. “I wish you would just call me Lisa, but I guess if you would, you wouldn’t be our Sayo-san~” 

Sayo nodded and sat across from her friend. “Where is everybody else? I didn’t think I arrived  _ that _ early.”

“Actually,” Lisa hesitated, biting her lip “I have something to tell you—”

“Lisa. Sayo,” said a cool voice. Yukina Minato nodded her head at both of them as she approached the table. “It’s great to see you.”

Lisa beamed, getting up to hug her best friend. “It’s only been like two weeks, Yukina!” Maneuvering herself behind the shorter girl, Lisa ushered Yukina into the booth. 

“Minato-san,” Sayo said, nodding at the other girl. Her voice broke slightly as she spoke. Yukina looked… different, somehow, from when they had last spoken. Yukina had cut her hair to her shoulders upon entering the workforce, now, it was straight down the length of her back, nearly to the length it was in high school. She was dressed nicely, and even in the dim lights of the restaurant, Sayo thought she looked absolutely beautiful. 

Lisa was still standing up. “Well, about that thing…”

“Hm?” Yukina vocalized, turning her head to look at Lisa.

“This was a bit of a set-up. Ako and Rinko aren’t coming tonight. I’ll be leaving now, order whatever you want, have fun and please talk to each other! I love you both, okay, bye!” Lisa quickly kissed Sayo on the cheek, and nearly ran out of the restaurant, impressively not tripping in her heels.

Silence fell over the table as Sayo looked back at Yukina.

“Well,” she said, feeling confused, sad, and angry all at once, “Have you looked over the menu? If Imai-san is paying, we might as well make her suffer for tricking us.”

Yukina laughed lightly. “Mm, let’s order the most expensive wine they have.”

So they did, and expensive steaks. Sayo even got a side of fries, which made Yukina laugh again. 

“How have you been, Sayo?” she posed. Despite the wine and the bit of laughter, it was still stilted between them.

“Fine,” Sayo said, “and you?”

“Good,” Yukina answered. This was how the majority of their conversations had gone, near the end.

Yukina drank another glass of wine. Their food was long gone, the bill paid with Lisa’s card, yet, neither girl could leave. Something was hovering between them, left unsaid.

“Do you think about it?” asks Yukina, suddenly. She’s averting her eyes from Sayo’s, glaring into the chandelier instead.

Sayo doesn’t answer. 

“What we could have had between us?” Yukina adds.

“You don’t get to say that,” Sayo says, after a long pause. “Minato-san, you don’t. After… that day? Really?” She, too, drinks a bit more before continuing. 

“Have you forgotten? I told you that I loved you, and I knew it was unprofessional but I wanted to be together, and you said nothing, and I left. And when I came back the next day, nothing had changed. And every day for the past fifteen years, nothing has changed, except that it’s grown so awful between us that we can’t even hold a conversation. So don’t ask me that. I guess we’ll never know, Minato-san. And that’s on you.”

“Sayo,” Yukina whispers. She has no tears to match Sayo’s own few, trickling down her face— after all, Yukina never cries. She does look wounded— but Sayo doesn’t even take pride in that. It just hurts.

“Sayo.” She says again, louder. Her hand lands softly on the other girl’s wrist. “I’m sorry. I—” 

“No.” Sayo, gently, but coldly, lifts Yukina’s hand away. “It’s too late.” She says as she rises. “I wish you felt like that ten years ago.”

Sayo walks to the restaurant door, not running like Lisa had, and hovers for a moment. 

She hovers at the door, and Yukina relives that day twelve years ago. 

And Sayo leaves, once more.

In the morning, Yukina texts Lisa, apologizing. Lisa tells her that Sayo caught the last bullet train home, and what did you do Yukina?!

* * *

Yukina doesn’t think she’s changed much over the years. She still loves cats, drinks obscene amounts of honey tea, and has an insane passion for music, above all. Yet, something must have shifted, because the her of fifteen years ago would have never shown up, uninvited and unwanted, to Sayo Hikawa’s apartment.

There she was, in the lobby of a gigantic—and quite ugly— apartment complex, prefectures away from her home. The lobby was more a bit attractive than the outside, making the complex seem somewhat chic and desirable. 

The walk from the train station had been brutal, dark, and rainy, with Yukina finding herself getting lost down the alleyways and side streets. Now, she felt bad for dripping water on the marbled floors— she had forgotten her umbrella, as usual.

She started at the buzzers, all at once trying to find Sayo’s name, work up the courage to press the button, and make a plan. The first tasks were achieved at once, the last still lingering on her mind as— 

“Hello?” said Sayo, a tinny voice coming through the speaker.

“Sayo. It’s— um— it’s Yukina Minato.”

“I told you it was too late,” said Sayo, tone shifting to one of frustration.

“Let me tell you my side, Sayo. Don't I deserve that much?”

“You lost that chance years ago.”

“ Please!” Yukina became aware of the stares of others in the lobby. “Please,” she repeated quietly. “Sayo.”

No answer came, but a buzzer sounded, and the glass door in front of her opened as she pulled.

She still didn’t have a plan. Within the chrome elevator, she worked to formulate one but came up with nothing. That had never been her strong suit. When it came to fixing a problem, especially within Roselia, Lisa or Sayo had taken the reins. the only time Yukina had ever tried… Well. It had been Sayo, hadn’t it? The idea of that teenaged Sayo, so sad and angry and empty, seemed so far away, and yet… Yukina had helped her, hadn’t she? So much so, that…

“You gave me the push I needed. Now its time for me to give you yours.”

That’s what Sayo had said. 

And, Yukina supposed, Sayo had pushed her again. Had done so fifteen years ago, in a practice room at CiRCLE.

“I love you,” Sayo had said, and pushed Yukina so far that she spun off her axis, and had been unable to reconcile the facts.

And as the elevator came to a stop on the 25th floor, Yukina recognized what had been true for so long.

  1. Sayo Hikawa was— or had been in love with her.
  2. She was in love with Sayo Hikawa.
  3. She was in love with Sayo Hikawa, and she had majorly fucked up.



Standing on the threshold of Sayo’s door, she knew.

4\. She was in love with Sayo Hikawa, and she was going to do something about it. 

She knocked.

“I’m sorry,” Yukina said as the door opened. “I’m sorry. I ruined everything. Sayo,” and she met the other girl’s eyes, and she looked shocked, but there was something else, and that something else pushed Yukina (as Sayo did, time and time again,) to say, “I love you. And I should have said earlier— years ago and I should have known earlier and I don’t have any right to. But I do. I do.” Yukina took a breath. She felt flushed and out of sorts, tripping over her words. Yukina usually spoke carefully, in a controlled manner. Not like this.

Sayo stared at her, and then, gently, shut the door behind her.

“Um,” she said, “Minato-san, can I—” and she very gently put her warm fingers on Yukina’s damp face and kissed her.

Sayo was trembling slightly, and Yukina thought she might be as well, but still. Sayo’s hands were so warm, rough with guitar calluses, unhealed from years ago. 

“We need to talk,” murmured Sayo, pulling back. Yukina nodded, pushing her forehead against Sayo’s. She laughed. Sayo smiled, though she felt conflicted. 

“We can keep doing this for a while.”

* * *

Later, when the rain had stopped and Yukina was feeling thoroughly well-kissed and red in the face, Sayo brewed them two cups of tea and sat them down on her very comfortable sofa. Yukina had expected Sayo’s apartment to be sharp and modern, but it was more warm and homey. There was even a fire going, started before Yukina’s arrival.

“Yukina,” Sayo said, setting down the cups of tea. “That’s… okay, right?” She asked, hesitancy clear.

“Definitely alright,” Yukina said, looking down at her hands. The silence seemed unbreakable.

“I’m sorry. I meant it. But the actions of my youth were… unexcusable.” Yukina said, slowly. 

“We were sixteen. I… I mean, I had no idea what I was talking about. I didn’t… I hardly knew what love was. It was unfair of me to put that on you. But it wasn’t okay for you to treat me like that— then, or now.”

“Do you know now? What love is? Has someone… shown you?” Yukina asked, against her better judgment. 

Sayo frowned. “Are you asking if I’ve been with anyone? Yukina, you don’t have the right to be jealous.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I was still angry for so long. I… I still am, to be honest. I know you’re sorry, but… Yukina. I told you I had feelings for you, you said nothing. That hurt me, it hurt our friendship, and it hurt Roselia, overall. That was supposed to be the most important thing.”

“I know.” said Yukina again, “I was so… stupid. I’ve acted stupidly. I’m so sorry,” she repeated, leaning into Sayo. 

“I know.” Sayo leaned back into Yukina. “I can’t believe you came out here.”

“It’s only three hours by bullet train. It’s a bit expensive but doable,” responded Yukina.

“Doable…?” Sayo questioned. “You mean, for the future? When did you become such a planner, Minato-san?”

“I don’t mean to be too forward, Sayo. But I… I want to be with you. Even if you’re out here in Osaka, I want to be with you. If that’s what you want.” 

“I didn’t mean that planning was a bad thing, but… I was planning as well. My lease is almost up on this apartment, and I think the group I manage is ready to hit the big leagues. That is to say, I think they’ll need to be based in Tokyo.” Sayo placed her hand on top of Yukina’s, squeezing her palm.

“ _ That _ is to say, would you like to go out sometime, Yukina?”

Yukina smiled, softly. “Always with a plan, Sayo.”

Sayo leaned down and kissed her again. “I don’t want to be angry or confused or scared anymore.” She said, pulling back. “I just want to be happy. Together.”

“That sounds nice,” Yukina replied, “That sounds perfect.”

"Imai-san is going to be unbearable about this," Sayo said, suddenly, "And angry that we ruined the reunion lunch."

"But you're coming back home. We can have reunion lunches every day, even." 

Sayo nodded. "We can start making up for lost time."

Yukina hummed her assent.

Outside, the rain began to pour again.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks so much for reading this fic! it's like my baby -- ive had the idea for it for months. please let me know what you think-- and if you're looking for more yukisayo, I'm at @chkariko on twitter <3


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